FAMILY DIVISION
Here we go. Let’s begin with last week’s big matchup.
The Ocean City Flockers (Diane) pulled off the big victory in a must-win situation. Now, the FLockers are tied with the Farmville Furies (Maddie) for the final spot in the Championship game next week.
This final week of the regular season has some excellent matchups. First, the Flockers need one more big win to have a chance of playing for the Championship. Standing in their way are the Seymour Hoosiers (Myiah).
The Hoosiers are only 5-10 on the season, but the Flockers better not take them for granted. The Hoosiers were the leading scoring team in the league last week and more than capable of playing the spoiler role.
And then we get this matchup.
Former Champion Farmville Furies need this win to become the first two-time Family Division champion next week. Meanwhile, the Poultry Platoon (Erika) stand alone in first place. However, a loss this week would push the Platoon into a tie with the Furies. Plus, if the Flockers also win, we could end with a three-way tie for two spots in the Championship game.
This week in the Family Division will be exciting.
FIRST DIVISION
As we enter the final week of the regular season, we will begin at the top with the good news. The Fruitland Fruit Flies (Tanner) won again and will be one of the top two seeds. The Flies are riding a five-game winning streak and are looking to maintain momentum heading into the playoffs. Unfortunately, while they have a playoff spot secured, their opponent this week does not.
The Hawaii Volcanos (Paul) are in the group of three, tied for the last spot in the playoffs.
This is a must-win game for the Volcanos. Bad luck to get the number one ranked and red-hot Fruit Flies.
One of the teams joining the Fruit Flies in playoffs will be the Baltimore Bulldogs (Katie). Congrats to the Bulldogs on a strong season. Their game this week may affect the standings, but their playoff spot is secured. So the Dogs can rest their starters and prepare for the playoffs next week.
Currently, third place in the standings belongs to the Louisiana Lightning (Denny). The Lightning demolished their Louisiana rivals last week and are positioned to get into the playoffs. However, there is work to be done. One more win will guarantee their spot.
The Olney Ospreys (Kirsi) have had a difficult season this year after winning the Championship in the Family Division last year. But now, the Ospreys get the opportunity to at least play spoiler in the final week of the season.
If the Lightning lose this week, they could fall into the dreaded tiebreak situation, and you never know how that will play out.
And this,
The Dakota Dragons (Butch) and Louisiana Lycanthropes (Kiley) have a play-in game. The loser of this game is eliminated. The winner should make the playoffs. However, if the Hawaii Volcanos win this week, there will be a two or three-team tiebreak. But first, these teams must take care of business in this big game to stay alive.
DYNASTY DIVISION
FANTASY FOOTBALL IS STUPID! (Chuck Hommey quote from a week ago).
Yes, yes it is.
Before we get into this week’s matchups, let’s take a deep dive into the Louisville Leafblowers (Shane) to highlight the reality of Chuck’s statement. The Leaf are in their 6th season in the Dynasty Division. They were one of the original two promotion teams and have continually built up their roster. That team building culminated in the Leaf being the second-highest-scoring team in the league this year, an impressive accomplishment.
For the last two years, the Leaf were in the frustrating situation of being the eighth seed, one spot short of the playoffs. But this year, the Leaf broke through and made their first Dynasty playoffs. Their opponent in the first round is the New Orleans Hurricanes (Jamie). The 10-4 Canes got the home game because they were the 3rd seed, while the Leaf were the 6th seed. Remember, the Leaf were the second-highest-scoring team in the league but the 6th seed. Why? A couple of breaks over the season led to a couple more wins for the Canes and a higher seed than the Leaf. Better lucky than good.
The Leaf are favored heading into the game because they are the better team. And things start playing out that way. With only two games remaining going into Sunday night, the Leaf had a 12-point lead with their kicker still to play. The Canes only had two defensive players, so this game was basically over. But fantasy football is stupid. So, suddenly Kayvon Thibodeaux goes absolutely nuts on Sunday night. Nine solo tackles, three stuffs, a sack, a forced fumble, a fumble recovery, and a touchdown. Kayvon puts up 15 points, giving the Canes a three-point lead. Before this week, Kayvon Thibodeaux had scored six points all season. And he scores fifteen in one game. Nuts!
But this story is not over with the dumb luck of the Canes with Thibodeaux. Down three going into Monday night, the Leaf have their kicker Mason Crosby going against the Canes defensive back Rasul Douglas. This game still looks like a likely victory for the Leaf.
The Leaf are up by two going into the 4th quarter Monday night. The Packers move into field goal range, and one more field goal should put the Canes away. However, Aaron Rodgers takes a sack on 3rd down, and Mason Crosby does not get to attempt the field goal. No problem, they are still up two.
Then, two plays later, the Canes’ Rasul Douglas picks off Baker Mayfield, getting two points and tying up the game. The crazy part is that Douglas picks off the pass at the Rams’ twenty-yard line. That would have been an excellent field position and likely Crosby points. But, just before going down, Douglas inexplicitly laterals the ball back, and the Packers end up with the ball on the 35. And you guessed it; they do not score. Good job, Douglas. You get the interception to tie the score and then lateral the ball back to limit Crosby. The Canes appreciate his strong team play and solid decision-making.
Now, on the Packers’ drive down the field yet again. With the score tied, all the Leaf need is one more point from Mason Crosby. An extra point or field goal will do the job. But, on a 3rd and two at the four-yard line with two minutes remaining, Christian Watson does not look back for the ball on what would have been an easy touchdown and Mason Crosby’s extra point.
So, Watson’s mistake leaves the Leaf and Canes tied.
No problem, it’s fourth down, so here comes the field goal. Right? But no, the Packers are going to for it. Instead of kicking the field goal, Aaron Jones runs up the middle and gets stopped just inches from the goal line. The Packers did get the first down, so it is first and goal at the six-inch line, which should be an easy score. There are mere inches from the TD and a Crosby extra point that would give the Leaf the win.
However, the Packers don’t need to do anything because the Rams are out of timeouts. Aaron Rodgers takes a knee three times, and the game ends without one more point from Mason Crosby. The Leaf and Canes remain tied.
A tie? That stinks. Now what? Well, if there is a tie in our playoffs, the higher-seeded team advances. So, the third-seeded Canes advanced to the semi-finals since the Leaf were the 6th seed. Sorry, Shane, an absolutely tragic chain of events and a brutal, undeserved elimination.
Aaron Rodgers was asked about the Christian Watson play in his post-game interview and said, “if you want to catch touchdowns, you gotta run the right route.” The Canes appreciate Watson not wanting another touchdown.
But, then, Rodgers adds, “we had a couple of drives in the 4th quarter but couldn’t put them away.” Yeah, and while the Packers still won, they killed the Leafblowers.
“Fantasy Football is stupid.” The Canes were not the better team over the season or this week. But, as always, better lucky than good.
Okay, on to this week.
PLAYOFF SEMI-FINALS
Last week, the Minnetonka Chippewas (Greg) picked up a big win to advance.
The Chippewas went from the Super Bowl in 2020 to the Toilet Bowl in 2021. Now, in 2022, they are a game from returning to the Super Bowl. That is the epitome of a high ceiling and low floor.
This week, they get the Hurricanes.
The Canes came into last week on a six-week regular season winning streak and a four-game postseason losing streak. Amazingly, they managed to break both streaks with a tie. But they did advance and are looking to return to the Super Bowl.
Is Minshew mania and the corresponding good luck real? Well, it is hard to argue, considering how lucky the Canes were last week. Minshew may even play this week along with his usual role of rallying the locker room.
The other semi-final is a classic.
In the 2019 semi-finals, the Phoenix Heat (Steven) defeated the Minnesota Blizzard (Geri) en route to the Super Bowl championship. Then, in the 2020 semi-finals, the Blizzard defeated the Heat en route to their Super Bowl championship. And here we are again. Best of three anyone? The winner of this game will be the obvious favorite in the Super Bowl next week.
PLAYDOWNS
And then we get to the playdowns. Last week, the DC Braves and West Virginia Rednecks picked up big wins and celebrated.
Now, we are down to four teams battling to survive. This week’s games will feature last year’s Super Bowl teams. Defending Champion Montana Mountaineers (Chuck) and the West Virginia Blacklungs (Rob S) battled it out last year in the Super Bowl but had challenging years this year. Now they are joined by the two losing teams from last week’s Playdown semi-finals. Losers will advance to next week’s Toilet Bowl.
What a delicious matchup this will be on Christmas eve and Christmas. Father and son battle it out in what should be a determined effort by both teams. It will certainly be a memorable Christmas for the Hommey family. Although, since Saturday is also Chuck’s birthday, maybe Zach will give him a gift. I mean, the Montana Mountaineers (Chuck) already provided the Saskatchewan Speedsters (Zach) an advantage with Lamar Jackson, Jonathan Taylor, and Deebo Samuel all out this weekend.
Like many teams this time of year, the story for The Real Dakota Dragons (Dakota) will be injuries. Their QBs, Jalen Hurts and Ryan Tannehill may sit out this week. Playing without a QB will make it even more challenging to take out the Blacklungs.
Speaking of the Blacklungs, with Justin Herbert, Justin Jefferson, AJ Brown, Mark Andrews, and a red-hot AJ Dillon, how is this team in the Playdown semi-finals? That roster seems capable of playing for the Super Bowl. But, alas, that is fantasy football. Being that the Blacklungs’ roster is relatively healthy going into this week, they can probably expect a few first-quarter injuries because fantasy football is stupid.
Good luck everyone.